Why People Suck. The struggles of decision making with ADHD

People Suck — Including You and Me

Most of us spend our lives making bad decisions, driven by our impulses and emotions. It’s not because we’re evil — it’s because we’re human. We’re emotional creatures trying to survive in a world that constantly tests us.

Childhood: Acting on Impulse

As kids, almost every decision comes from how we feel in the moment. We lack experience, discipline, and emotional control — only raw feelings. That’s why tantrums, rage, and lashing out happen. Kids aren’t logical; they’re learning.

Then we grow up — at least physically. Mentally, most of us are still those same kids, just playing by society’s rules. Now, our actions carry real consequences.We know right from wrong, but we still make terrible decisions. Why? Because our inner child is still in charge — only now with stronger desires, addictions, and distractions.

Why We Keep Making Bad Choices

If we can tell right from wrong, why do we keep chasing instant gratification?

Because nobody taught us how to strengthen our rational self — the part of the mind built for reason, discipline, and self-control.

Rationality

Being rational might sound boring or robotic, but it’s one of our most powerful tools. Think of it as the king or queen of your inner world. Rationality can silence emotional noise and make smart decisions that lead to growth, stability, and success.

But unchecked rationality becomes cold and paranoid — safe, but lifeless. That’s why it needs balance. Your rational self works best alongside other parts of your personality — wisdom, confidence, grit, and joy. Together, they make decisions that consider both logic and emotion.

The Balance of Power

Picture your mind like a round table:

• Rationality = 5

• Joy, Confidence, Wisdom, Grit = 2 each

Rationality should listen to its generals but keep the final say. Compromise, guidance, and balance — that’s how the kingdom stays in order.

ADHD: When the King Gets Overthrown

For those of us with ADHD, balance doesn’t last long. Our rational king or queen gets overthrown by impulses, emotions, and distractions.

• Sometimes Joy takes over, chasing instant gratification.

• Sometimes Desire or Chaos runs the show, making reckless decisions.

The result: a mental kingdom in conflict — a mind that wants peace but keeps falling into war.

The Takeaway

To survive — and stop being a person who “sucks” — we have to train our rational side.

• Not to suppress emotion, but to guide it.

• Strong enough to lead with reason, but wise enough to listen to feeling.

• Don’t let impulses, fears, or cravings overthrow your inner king.

When reason and emotion finally learn to work together, that’s when you stop reacting and start evolving.